I want to disappear. I don't go anywhere. I don't do anything. I feel like I'm just burdening everyone. I can't even have an emotional break down without feeling guilty. I get so angry. I just grind my teeth. If I just shut up, it won't bother anyone.
I can't fucking blame you because you'll just blame me. It's not my fault that it's all your fucking fault. Now I'm alone with all of what you've done. With all of what you've taken from me. With all of what you've left me.
I'm so lucky to have a life that is dictated by how shitty I do or don't feel that day.
And no matter what that day is like, it ends exactly the same way it did yesterday.
And I'm all alone.
So thats how I'm feeling. Maybe now I can concentrate on cleaning.
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